Motherhood

I've decided my thoughts on motherhood will probably never be complete enough to my liking, so I'll just have to add bits and pieces of how I feel and what I think here and there. Every day I learn something new. And it's not all diaper or burping info. I learn new things about myself and my feelings regarding my new role as mother.

Today I was peed on. Twice. Jamie has been extra fussy lately. He'll sleep for an hour and a half and wake up hungry. I'm pretty sure he's going through a growth spurt so I'm not too concerned. He has good reasons to be fussy. Growing is exhausting. I can't imagine how uncomfortable breaking in a new digestive system would be. I know I did it at one point, but I'm pretty glad I don't remember it. Doesn't sound pleasant.

Days like today should probably be the more emotionally difficult ones, but I enjoyed today. He's such a beautiful boy. I love his skin. And his eyes. He has such an expressive face. The lip quiver, the pout, his wide-eyed observation face, his dopey "I'm content" face. And that hair! I love to run my fingers through it while he's nursing. I also love the way he gets all worked up and then the minute he latches on to eat he sighs and is in utter bliss. I love him, but even better I *like* him.

I got a break when my parents came home, so I could make dinner. Alysa has been craving sloppy joes and I found a recipe that I decided to try. Okay, I have this aversion to sloppy joes. I don't know exactly what it is, but something about the color and the texture and even the name "sloppy joes"...it just isn't classy. And I like to make classy food. Fish and roast chicken, for example. Sloppy joes don't fit into that category. BUT. This homemade sloppy joe recipe was YUMMY. And the ingredients are cheap and easy to come by. The name still needs work, but other than that I think I'm a sloppy joe convert.